I started this one a few days ago, and it's extremely relatable.
If you've ever been a substitute teacher or, really, spent any time in a classroom, many goings-on written here will sound familiar. Behaviors and attitudes I originally thought belonged only to Arizona public school children are also found in Maine's public school children, where the author does his substitute teaching. That leads me to assume that the same is true all along that diagonal line across our country. While that makes me feel better as an Arizonan, I wouldn't say it makes me feel better as an American.
But I don't don't want to concentrate on the bad stuff. I really enjoy the hilarious anecdotes, and I'm mostly interested in regaining a healthier (and less burned out) perspective on being a guest teacher nearly every day. This is helping.
Even some of the chapter titles are suitably funny: She Stole My Grape; That's Just the Way School Is; and I Suck at Everything. I am honestly looking forward to the chapter titled There's Nothing Exciting or Fun Happening Today. A day with a sub should not be exciting. The one thing that scares me the most is when kids walk through the door first thing and are way too excited to have a sub. I try to nip that in the bud, begin forcefully, and not smile for at least an hour. I'm kidding. Or am I? Stay on your toes because you just.don't.know.
On the other hand, being a sub has taught me to not take myself so seriously. According to kids, subs know nothing. We're a bunch of dummies who need to be told what to do by twenty-five kids. In some ways, that's true and it's always nice to have one or two go-to kids that you know you can ask for help. Discreetly. But admitting that you don't know everything, is actually quite a relief. I've learned a lot in the two years I've been subbing, but learning that there's so much I don't know is probably the best thing I've learned so far. One of the most memorable quotes from this book was in the first paragraph:
On the other hand, being a sub has taught me to not take myself so seriously. According to kids, subs know nothing. We're a bunch of dummies who need to be told what to do by twenty-five kids. In some ways, that's true and it's always nice to have one or two go-to kids that you know you can ask for help. Discreetly. But admitting that you don't know everything, is actually quite a relief. I've learned a lot in the two years I've been subbing, but learning that there's so much I don't know is probably the best thing I've learned so far. One of the most memorable quotes from this book was in the first paragraph:
I didn't have a teaching certificate, and I'd never taught in a primary or secondary school, but that didn't matter--all you need is a high school diploma (bachelors degree in anything if you live in Arizona), a clean criminal record, and a willingness to tolerate your own ineptitude.
A willingness to tolerate my own ineptitude. Yep. That's what I got!
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