He leaves for work thirty minutes before I do, and at that moment I am usually in the middle of my getting-ready ritual. So when he sees me in the morning I've either just rolled out of bed, gotten out of the shower, still brushing my teeth, or drying my hair. Let's just say I don't look my best.
However, I go to work looking pretty decent most days. I fight hard to make my hair look nice, I put on a little makeup, and I try to wear flattering clothes. But after school, I quickly wash all the school germs off my face, take out my contacts and put on my glasses, change into a comfy t-shirt and shorts, and sometimes, especially if I've spent a day in PE, I take a shower.
What I'm saying is that when he's around, I usually don't look like the woman he married. I look like a tired and sloppy version of her. I wonder if he notices. I wonder if he cares. He never says anything, but he's a thoughtful guy and is probably sparing my feelings. Should I care? Should I try harder? I don't think he's that in to looks. Clearly. So I think I'll just stay comfortable. At least I have the cleanliness thing going for me.
2 comments:
Sara, I completely understand and can empathize. I think it is even more important and a high value that you can articulate your views. In the business world I experienced similar feelings when new management would come in and change 180 policies or projects that I had worked hard to implement. It was more personal to hear them criticize or downright make is disparaging remarks. I wanted to speak up (especially when valued employees said they liked what was done and did not like the new ways). In some cases I took out my frustration on those who made the changes, some of the innocent employees who transitioned (traitors), and the organizations. However, as I got older (maybe wiser) and focused on myself, I learned to Let It Go. I learned to channel my energy ( which I control) to new ventures or goals. It's amazing how much better and effective I feel. So don't assume you are alone and try not to dwell.
Yes! Oh the traitors, Bob! hahaha I don't take anything out on them, but I do look at them with wonder at how easily they can be bought. Oh well. Moving on to the new stuff! :)
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